yesterday went for teens service, and i was late again. i missed worship again. )): srsly, i hate being late for service. i've been missing worship for so long. i totally detest it lah. DD:

then, all those guilt filled my mind. I asked myself: what have i done for God? what have i sacrificed for Him? i felt so sad, so upset, so ashamed. all the thoughts gushed into my thoughts and my feelings. my answer to myself and to God was: i don;t know, i seemed to be not doing anything. my mind was totally blank. okay, maybe i did a little, sacrificed a little bit.

But then, the feeling was just inferior. like, other ppl did alot alot. after so many sharings i've heard all these while, it strucked me so hard. i feel that i'm not worth of Jesus dying on the Cross for me, God's unfailing love and guidance to me. For the first time in my life, i felt this way. So ashamed of myself towards God. DD:

AHHH. and then, i find that i cannot really share everything with my cell croup. :(( i don;t know why. the feeling of just something, i don;t know what. but then, maybe it's insecurity, i'm not really sure of it. I just can't. i realised i haven't open up totally. when i'm in a different situation, i can't open up. )):

Lord, i need you.
I NEED YOU BADLY.

alright, i know i shouldn;t feel this way.
But then, i know clearly that Jesus love me,
and i love Jesus. :DD

I;m worth of His love!
((:

Lead me ;
lead me,
O Lord.

:DDD
okok, get ready for school. ((: haha.

hungry@ 12:55 pm